Have you ever been laying in bed, possibly naked, just thinking about us? "What's going on over there at Violent Little...they're so closed off, emotionally...physically." We heard your whispers loud and clear. Now we're going to lift up the dress, let you take a free peek under the hood. Here's a list of Violent Little's Top 10 Bestselling Morale Patches for 2015. People love top 10 lists. It gives you so much information whilst telling you virtually nothing at all. We're going to buck that trend, starting right now, and tell you basically everything -Chunk-Goonies-Hand-in-the-blender style. Everything...
Here at Violent Little, we aren't a bunch of secretive little bitches. While some people may be shocked at the numbers we're about to share with you, its important to put into perspective that your hard-earned dollars that you spend at Violent Little HAS CHANGED LIVES. Violent Little currently supports three full-time people and our direct families, encompassing eight people. It blows our mind to think that eight people live off of these little pieces of leather, cloth, and PVC that we make. Amongst us are a veteran, a DOCUMENTED immigrant pursuing the American Dream, and a college dropout with a checkered, dreadlocked past that puts most "well-educated" people to shame when it comes to smarts, skills, and pulling oneself up by your bootstraps. Over the past two years or so that Violent Little Machine Shop has been in business we've employed four veterans, all of whom recently exited the military, and half of which have gone on to start their own successful businesses. We've donated tens of thousands of dollars towards the causes that this community of ours holds dear (Saving the Bees, Chris Kyle, Breast Cancer, Marines in Tennessee, Je Suis Charlie, LEO, Chris Mintz, SOF Foundations). Its pretty tough to take patches seriously...we literally just get drunk and think of stupid shit that will bring smiles to faces. But the business of patches, ladies and gentleman, we want you to know, has truly changed so many people's lives for the better. We're honored every day and at every dollar that comes in, and every patch that goes out, that we have your trust that we'll make good on our promises. Thank you.
And without further ado, here is the 2015 list of bestsellers based on total revenue:
Breaking into the top ten is the Bye Felicia patch with 610 patches sold in 2015. This was a collaboration between Violent Little and our artist, Joshua Johnson. We went out to dinner one night and we both counted to three and said the patch that was on our mind...and so it was so...so we made it.
Still going strong is the We're Here To Fuck Shit Up patch, inspired by Step Brothers, with 472 patches sold in 2015. This patch was originally designed by Brian Muir, the same designer that created the JTAC Shack patch. We purchased the rights to this art in 2014 for $500.
Even though the Aloha Snackbar patch by Tactical Outfitters has been around for a while, we had to try it out in our lineup to see how she did. Better late than never, we always say. We sold 557 of them over 2015 so far, which included a special limited edition "Limey" version as well.
We've sold 149 of these "Not a Survival Patch" survival patches in 2015 thus far. Credit goes out to our friend Brandon J., former Navy SEAL, for coming up with the idea for this patch while on a Violent Little Cowboy Cookout...which is when we bring all the shop and our friends out and cook a big ole' mountain man breakfast over a campfire in the mountains. I think we spent $200 on ribeyes alone that morning for everybody...totally worth it!
The TK-421 patch, much like its namesake, is such a sleeper. There was no fanfare surrounding this patch. In fact, it only took ten minutes to design and $0 in artist fees, but was on-point enough to sell 701 of these over 2015 to snag sith place. Not bad for something that literally couldn't have had less effort put into it.
The Talk to me Goose patch raked in 724 patches of sales in 2015. This was one of our earlier patches that gave us a good sense of what this patch game was all about and where it could go. What does that mean exactly? Well...people bought a shitload of them, so we tried to think of other cool things to sell a shitload of. "You know, giving him the bird?"
This was the wildcard that nobody saw coming. The Heavy Days patch by Thirty Seconds Out almost snuck onto the podium with 728 patches sold in 2015. The founder of Thirty Seconds Out used to work for Violent Little before he broke off for his solo act with his debut album "Clobberin' Time". The moral of the story, hire people with potential...you never know when they'll make you a lot of money.
The Creasy Bear patch was our number one patch in 2014, but it slides to number three this year with 940 patches sold. This was the patch that really started it all for us. The day that Soldier Systems posted this patch I was coming home from an overnight camping trip and didn't have cell phone reception. As soon as I got over the mountain pass my phone blew up with order notifications and I knew there was something special to this game.
We sold 479 of the Imperial Express four-patch set in 2015. We flew artist Joshua Johnson into Sun Valley, ID to develop this series. It required all the micromanagement we could muster. Josh wanted to kill himself after this trip, we think. The inspiration for this patch came from a customer who came to the shop to visit us. He had a white AMEX card that looked a lot like a stormtrooper-themed card. And that's all there was. Remember, always be on the lookout for inspiration...you never know when a twenty thousand dollar idea will just appear out nowhere.
No big surprise, the undisputed champion for 2015 is the Valhalla Admit One patch series with 5,345 of these bad boys sold this year. We've launched twelve color variations of 2A Athletics' incredible design over the past year...with more to come. The second we saw a leaked photo of this patch last year we became obsessed with it and knew it was going to be a winner. We're proud to be entrusted with this patch.
I like the top 10 list and I have a number of your patches in my office pissing off the PC Police. The TK-421 patch is definitely cool, but I do have a question. When you wrote “…to snag sith place.”, were you being clever or simply suffering from punishing your liver?
January 29, 2016