"...or I'll go ape shit on your ass!" The best southern insults are the ones shrouded in subtlety like "I just love how you don't care what people think" and the "Bless your/his/her heart".

Then again, there are some pretty good obvious ones too like "His face reminds me of a drunk raccoon near an exposed septic tank".  

Also. The price of those loaves is RIDICULOUS. Do the math. 

• 3" x 3" 3D PVC
• Hook-Backing
  
• "I wet my bed until I was 19...no shame in that."